So, you want to start a podcast?
Great. Follow these exact steps and you too can launch your very first episode in a haze of confusion, sweat, and misplaced confidence.
Step 1: Decide on a Topic
We picked ours roughly four times. First version was too broad. Second was too niche. Third didn’t exist. Eventually we settled on something none of us had prepared for, and no one wrote down. Classic.
You’ll know your topic is final when you’ve already recorded half the episode and can’t be arsed changing it.
Step 2: Gather Your Hosts
Make sure everyone is in a different mood. One person should be tired, one distracted, one half-drunk on energy drinks, and one actively Googling “best way to record a podcast on short notice.”
At least one person will think the recording is tomorrow. That’s important. It adds tension.
Step 3: Don’t Script Anything
Scripts are for professionals. Real podcasters wing it. Don’t write an intro. Don’t plan an outro. Don’t even outline what you’re going to say. Just hit record and rant.
If you forget your point halfway through? Embrace it. That’s flavour.
Bonus points for show notes scrawled on an old envelope next to the kettle.
Step 4: Clap Sync (Optional)
Start with a countdown. Someone will clap early. Someone else will forget what you’re doing. One mic won’t register the clap at all. Now spend thirty minutes later trying to line that up in editing.
This is the foundation of your timeline. Trust it completely.
Step 5: Use Whatever Gear You’ve Got
Mic from 2012? Fine. Laptop fan loud enough to drown out helicopters? Roll with it. Just keep the cat off the keyboard and try not to sneeze into the condenser mic.
Step 6: Embrace the Interruptions
Kettle boils mid-sentence. Neighbour starts mowing the lawn. You forget what you were saying and check your phone. Don’t cut it. Leave it in. It’s honest.
Step 7: Editing
Give this job to the only available person: you. You’ve used Audacity before, right? Perfect. Now spend two hours lining up your own voice with nothing but waveforms, spikes, and regret.
Chop out the worst pauses, fix what you can, and leave the rest. No one expects BBC quality.
And that’s how we did it.
Not how we meant to. Not how we’ll explain it in interviews. But how it actually happened.
It’s scrappy, unscripted, a bit rough around the edges, and somehow, it works. It sounds like someone who actually gives a shit, even if we’re slightly knackered and mostly angry.
So if you’re thinking of starting a podcast, here’s the real advice:
Lower your standards. Raise your voice. And press record.
